Tuesday, June 22, 2010

Practicing for College

So, my son went off to a leadership conference for a week and I don't like it at all.

I think he is having a great time, and believe me when I tell you I am so happy that he is. It makes it so much easier. BUT, I miss him so much.

I think what I miss the most is knowing about his life, who he is hanging out with, who he is meeting and what he is feeling.

This feels like practice for college.

I'm OK with this only because I know he is coming home in a week. How will I feel when this is the real thing.

He wasn't able to bring his computer with him, so I connect only through a few text messages and a some really short phone conversations.

I just had to stop writing because I received a text from Kyle. I can see it now, my world revolving a few short semi-sentences. I hear my phone signal a text and I get so excited. Here comes anther one...my heart races as I type. PAUSE.

I love his texts. Like him, they make me smile.

He is at a college campus with 1,000 boys from all over the state. The conference is called Boys' State. He is definitely stepping out of the Northern California bubble he has lived in and it seems like he is sucking the marrow out of this experience.

I am proud of him. That is when I'm not bugging Will because now that Kyle is away he gets all my attention. And this week seems to be a week of unhealthy obsession. And poor Will is the object of my obsession. He laughs at me but I can tell I'm starting to really bug him.

I think when Kyle finally goes off to college, Will is going to miss him even more than me. I mean, can you imagine all the unhealthy attention this poor kid is going to have to handle?


  1. I've already started to worry about how much I'll miss my eldest when he goes off to college next year too. It will be hard not to be able to talk to him every day. I also worry about whether or not my youngest will finally start to talk to me.

    Terry, if you still want to ask me a question, you can email me at amanbacon@yahoo.com.

  2. Terry, I went through a similar shock last summer when both kids went to sleep away camp. I suddenly understood that it's the parent's lot to forever miss their child and the child's job to leave us behind. It was gut-wrenching. This year no sleep away camp!

  3. To me it just may be the silver lining of a wrecked economy and an uncertain world... my kids living forever with me because there are no jobs out there when they're finally ready to launch.

    I do dread the empty nest, but somehow dimly remember being able to amuse myself in life before children.

    And I look forward to the consolation of grandparenting—being the free baby-sitting service is a dream to strive for.

    Wishing you warmth in the breezy space of a happy child's brief absence.

  4. Same as Linda, I felt very similar when both boys went to camp last summer -- its like your right arm is gone -- for a while. But as long as he is happy, you will be fine. And you will be able to talk to him when he goes to school - so fear not. This is all part of what we have to do -- let go. And it is the right thing to do no question.

  5. Oh, you love that boy so dearly. I think it's sweet that he texts you while he's away...my stepson cannot be bothered to text me!

  6. See, texting is awesome!!
    How proud you must be of him doing this conference. Lucky kid.
    It is good practice and you will miss him like crazy. But you're on to a whole new aspect of your relationship with him. AND....there's always summers...

  7. It's hard letting them go. Texting is great! What an awesome opportunity for your son! And you know the younger one is loving the extra attention!

  8. My heart hurts right now thinking about it!!! Did you see Toy Story 3 yet? Andy goes to college and, even though my 1st guy to go is only 8, I bawled like a baby!! Thinking of you...