Wednesday, November 4, 2009

The Y's of my Life

The hard drive on my computer looks like it is toast which means I have potentially lost everything.

I sat at the Apple store with box of tissue and actually cried. Then I remembered it wasn't an awful health diagnosis we were talking about and I pulled myself together.

Right now my computer is at the Apple Care store and they are trying to retrieve any data from the the little chips that make up my life.

So, again I have taken over my son's computer with the sticking y key. I literally have to hit the y key three times before it works. Perhaps for the rest of this post I will just leave out all the y's.

Tomorrow is parent/counselor/student night at K le's high school. The counselors are there to act as a buffer between the parents and the kids. I can't help but wonder what has happened in the past that are poor kids need buffers.

But I think I can use this time for some helpful and healthy dialogue between myself and K le. I am having such a difficult time trying to help him balance all the things in his life. I feel like I have become just one more stress for him. But at the same time, he seems to need (and sometimes) want me there to help him make difficult decisions.

Some smart Mom once told me that you don't want your junior to have a girlfriend. Well, I'm actually (it's too hard to skip at the y's in my life) delighted he has met someone he really likes. But, it is a delicate balancing act he is preforming. And at an moment he seems like he is about to fall.

I, like a good helicopter Mom, am there to catch him.

Has the time finally come to let him fall.

Tom seems to think so, until he hears Kyle bitch about a bad test grade. He doesn't just shake it off and say whatever college he gets into is just fine. That's what he has been telling me to do the last year. Now, he thinks Kyle might need some guidance. Because, finally he realizes that Kyle cares about having choices in his college selection process.

The problem for us is that Kyle really works hard (most of the time) and he has done so well. He tries so hard to be a good student, a thoughtful friend, a good son, a good brother, a good peer resource.

Does he still want us to help him? Sometimes he says he does. And sometimes he says, "Back off."

This has confused me but now Tom is confused too. I don't expect Tom to be confused and it really pisses me off.

1 comment: